I'm so glad it rained. Its been hellish lately, and as someone who is out a lot during the daylight hours, I can say with authority that weeks straight of 90 degrees, blazing sun and hideously high humidity are exhausting. Some rainy gray days are just what the doctor ordered. I'm meeting Adam for lunch and I'm so happy it's nasty out I might even try to walk the 100 blocks to meet him.

I've realized lately that being alone so much during the day lets me indulge in my predilection for pop culture all too freely. And then Jen comes home and all I have to say to her is "The L word is getting a spin off! Maybe! Sort of on the internet!" Or "I saw Tina Fey's yearbook photo today!" and I'm starting to be ashamed of myself. So I started to read some feminist theory, which wasn't something I ever went in for much before, being mostly wrapped up in the queers...and its interesting. Not ALL for me, but useful in some ways, and its nice to feel like I'm not the first person to have the thoughts I sometimes have about how frustrating it is to try to operate in a world where the dominant theories of behavior and culture don't always consider gender in a way that's relevant to my personal experience.

Interesting that I've started to look at this stuff now, because Jen and I have hit some new snags on our babymaking journey and we're talking more about the possibility of me carrying the child instead of her. I must admit, because of my own hangups, I've been ambivalent about this idea in the past. But now I'm getting really excited about it. And the way I'm getting excited about it is by removing the idea of pregnancy or motherhood from the preconceived notions I've usually associated them with, which really made them rather discontiguous with my identity and sense of self, and beginning to reframe them in a way that's relevant for me and me and Jen. Which is actually, literally THRILLING.

Oh no. Its getting sunny out again. Fuck.